Developing the Character of Christ

I know it is our human nature to resist struggles and to know the end and thereby plan for it. But that is exactly what you do not want us to do; plan, that is. That is why you don't show us the end. This way you can guide us on a path that brings about the necessary change: a smoothing of some areas and a sharpening of others, to create in us a character that matches Christ. Your character "For he who has seen me has seen the Father, also"

When metal is put to the polishing wheel, sparks often fly out like sharp screams of pan. Likewise, our sharpening and smoothing is painful but necessary to remove the pain and hurt of the experiences of the work. I went to a psychologist once to get help and answers about my feeling with regard to my parents. After only two sessions she told me I should forgive my parent and get over it. It sounded so easy. but the problem was, forgive them of what? I had gone to see her partly because I couldn't remember much of my childhood and couldn't figure out why. And much of what I could remember wasn't pleasant. I needed something more, so I turned to God.

Over the next several years the Holy Spirit began leading me to Journal. I also began recounting my experiences and discussing my memories with my sister and brother. Each of them began filling in my missing pieces and showed me some memories I had  altered. I had tried so hard to remember my mother in a 'June Cleaver' view, but what I began to see was a picture of neglect and verbal and emotional abuse.

Then, during a large family get together, I got a glimpse into my mother's childhood and the abuse she suffered at the hands of an overtly stern father and a passive mother. Now, I can forgive her and, now, I am at peace with my memories of her. I can honestly say, "I love you, Mom, and I forgive you. Please forgive me for all that I put you through." And I can say it because I found the best psychologist to be the Holy Spirit working through God's divine plan.

I still remember my mother in the fictional persona but I know this is a false memory. In my mother's absence, I placed her image over my sister's; the one who was always there for me.
Thank you, God for a great sister and an experience I can use to help others.  Amen